Priorities, what a game changer when you take a real look at who and what is a priority in your life, both in the things that you do and the relationships that you have.
I laugh, as that’s the perfect sequel to this blog - a blog about love - the messy parts of how we interact, the transparent truth of what is vs what you’d like your relationship to be, actions vs words and love towards yourself… the way you love, how you deserve to be loved and the love you desire. My entire premise is about teaching you how to love your entire self vs looking to be loved!
So we start our journey together with the ironic part - years ago, you could have asked me if writing this blog was important to me and my instant response would have been, yes! Years later, with experience and a clearer look at the big picture, I would answer that question differently and say no. My desire to write and share has always been there but I didn’t put my passion into action until right now, nor did I make the time for something so important to me (lack of loving myself) ….. so after all these year, my want and desire to write has now come into fruition, as I begin this lifetime love affair of writing, sharing, growing, expressing and traveling with you. (FYI - a new blog will be posted every Sunday and Wednesday morning)
TODAY'S QUESTION: When was the last time you had one of those “ah ha” moments? One of those moments that shake your world, cause a change, ignite a fire within, open your eyes to what actually is.
Just like our priorities in what we do, we take a look at the relationships and the people we make a priority. I wonder how many of you are in love with a man (or woman) who says they love you, who use words to express how important you are to them but at the end of the day, there is an entire list of other people, other responsibilities, meetings, phone calls and their to do lists which come before you and your relationship. How many times have you heard.... “I’m really busy with work” or “can that wait until later” or “I’d really like too but I don’t have the time”… I smile, as it’s so easy to create a story in our head, making excuses for being put on the back burner. Beings someone second choice isn't love, especial when you find yourself making sacrifices, giving your time and energy to someone who isn't showing up the best that they can.
I spent years of my life in love with a man who tried his best, who loved the idea of having someone genuine and simple in his life. A man who would show up in selective moments, yet consumed with his work, with this past relationship of 23 years, holding on vs. letting go. He loved with a boundaries. Loved the idea of a someone new yet held so tightly to maintaining both the comfort of his past marriage and the excitement of someone new. For the first time, I realize that I had love blinders on, knowing how selfish this component of our relationship was yet being okay with it, for when we were together, I felt life I was on top of the world and allowed myself to believe and hope that time, would result in a change. It's been 5 years since his divorce and his story is still the same, just without me.
So what do you do? You become really aware of the relationships in your life. You have the courage to make changes. You decided what is really important to you and you find the strength to share and speak your truth and then observe. You stay or you walk away, either way, my hope is that you are seen, cherished, loved and a priority. You find the courage to trust that whatever's meant to be, will always be. You find peace with change, with the difficult and overlook the fear of being alone….. for the secret is, when you fall in love with your own life, you are never truly alone.
BIG QUESTION: Why did it take me so long to start or change something that was so important to me - both in my actions and in my relationship?